a list of 10....

26. words finally spoken

27. the thought of my own rainbow making chickens

28. the smell of fresh brewed coffee

29. sun beams through wisps of hair

30. living in a time when 30 miles isn't very far at all

31. Happy eyes

32. knowing I'm not only saved through Grace but JUSTIFIED.....forgiven+restored.

33. Pink blossoms on trees

34. girl-scout cookies, and COLD milk

35. made up lovesongs....to mama, and God...filled with silliness and Truth.

Thank you Lord, for eyes WIDE open.

The Bounty of Just Enough....

How many times have I opened my fridge and moaned?
How many times have I said I was broke, flat can even buy gas broke?
How many times have my eyes glazed over, as I held gratitude captive and invited envy in, and sat down to a too full plate with greed?

How often have I missed the blessing of Just Enough?

More times then I can count money has run tight, the fridge and the cupboards so stark they look more like a cavern of white, and for a moment I forget to breath.

Oh, I've had to lean heavy on the bounty of just enough.

Like a parade, one roasted chicken stretches into 3 meals. I find fresh air, and inhale. Children giggle; happy and content with what they find here- both tangible and not, and my God promising....I will provide.....I will bless......with the bounty and over abundance of Just Enough. I can see the fullness here. In this moment there is bounty.

He promises this to me as an unseen blessing, as a love offering because He, my maker knows.....too much makes my eyes wavier, makes my stomach hunger for things untasted, makes my wits and soul song dim. When I am full by the worlds standards I forget the blessing of breath, I forget that I'm always going to be uncomfortable here, because this world is not my home. I stop longing for home.

I forget my need of HIM,
I forget my thanksgiving,
I forget the mini-miracles,
the MANY gifts:

21. sunlight bent through rounded glass

22. perspective, and watching it shift towards Grace....fullness....

23. children hiking a snow topped mountain

24. chubby toes, small brightly colored nails

25. seeing that just enough is a keep your eyes on ME love offering, not a withholding.

...Just enough.....

To see grace, to be filled, to be free.

Would you dare to Believe?

I was so blessed by the Matthew West concert! God always meets us just where we are, surrounded by JUST the people we should share each moment with. People who can understand your heart, and see small blessings. People who you can cry for as they sit just as exposed as you....lumps of clay battered by the harsh elements in this world....but His water restores....shapes.......

Would you dare to believe? Would I dare to believe?

The opener was Josh Wilson....and he sang.....



...My friend, you know how this all ends
and you know where you're going,
you just don't know how you get there
so just say a prayer.
and hold on, cause there's good who love God,
life is not a snapshot, it might take a little time,
but you'll see the bigger picture.....

in blessings....

11. A snow dusted mountain view from my own backyard

12. Tortilla wrapped goodness that filled my belly, with a side of friendship that filled my soul.

13. Soft inviting cheeks that wiggle when mama is uttered in baby talk that lingers even as 3 is approaching.

14. The thought that tending anything takes patience and sweat to see growth, and toil as we may the final fruit comes only by Gods hand.

15. Fresh turned soil on a sunny day.

16. Bits of paper love spread about in a prism of colors and shapes ( how have I missed the goodness in this perseverance and tiny love offerings?!?)

17. An arm offered for comfort- first steps.

18. Laughter! Oh the splendor of variation and sound! Giddy, goofy, boisterous, contagious, snorting, even silent found only in the twinkling of the eyes- all so beautiful fluid and life filling.

19. Long dark eyelashes batting, pulling, suckering me in

20. A wisp of weeds left for a ladybug haven and spot hunting and the squeals of joy as spots are counted. "A Six spotter mom!!!"

.....Once you feel the way of glory,
all your pain will fade to memory....

Five in the midst....

Oh today has been rocky....motherhood battles for souls....one of those days when you feel like you are standing at arms against your charges rather the WITH and FOR them. Blessedly I know the truth- I am gate-keeper, I am on watch, I will not back down.....

so here are my five for the day so far in the midst of chaos, but my guess is God in His goodness will give me more as the day settles....

6. Hot cocoa on cold days....warms little cool hearts as well as bellies

7. The privilege to Home school my children- which on days like today means the opportunity to educate and train their hearts as well as minds.

8. PRAYER- it's power, its healing, it's direct connect to my Savior and life source

9. My new to-do list rules- No more then 10 things in a day to focus on, pick 3 Most Important Things- be satisfied if those 3 get done, even if the other 7 don't. Leave room for life and the wonderful people who you choose to fill it with.

10. MATTHEW WEST! tonight I get to unwind with a few of my closest friends and praise my maker....after this week of motherhood trench work, after FINALLY seeing the blessings in all of life.....I can't wait to lift my hands to my maker as my spirit bows low....

Beginning again....

Here, my heart has found a softness I've been missing of late...

I will begin again counting blessings.... Can I too reach 1000? Can the simple act of gratitude so change a life?

Reading Ann Voskamp's blog, and now, book has opened my red rimmed, tired eyes to what my Lord really has waiting for me too; if I can just seize this daily, moment by moment act of thanksgiving. If I take time to come here and add, reflect, and kneel humbly before Him who gives all- who gives only good and perfect gifts. Who takes the muck of life, and turns the bad into gardens of the soul; if only I stop to look for it eyes wide open.

Here, I begin again....remembering....restoring what He gave to us all in the beginning... bountiful life.... the blessing of here...my count will start. may it never again cease...

1. Children's laughter as imaginative games flood my home. Today it's fairies throwing a party and building "huts".

2. Jazz piano rifts...how amazing to be provided with a teacher that teaches Suzuki method with Jazz. I've always had a fondness for the moodiness and soul of that style. Until radar I missed how Gods blessed my heart, not just AJs in this...

3. Rain! Although my children are bound by it, the soil needs it. My future garden space will be easier to weed and prep and hopefully bear much fruit. All sunshine a desert makes. We want NO deserts here. Not of the land or if the soul. So I can finally welcome the rain.

4. Great books. Again today I am blessed by the honey of good authors!!! For me and the babies. We were reading an abridged version of the Wind in the Willows then while looking for another book I found the honey of an original. Never accept a sweet and low version!!! You miss so much. The under tones and subtleties are lost. Reading the originals make the story vivid, fluid. Such a great reminder of how the authentic is ALWAYS worth the time.

5. Friendships that are like family, and family that are trusted friends. Relationships that feed and are fed. The sustaining moments of crying with and for others. Truly laughing out loud, and shaking our heads. This is the stuff that fills a life and heart.

...Five for today, five for tomorrow. Can I grasp five new moments of thanksgiving a day? Five new places to find love and gratitude? Five moments of awe in which I can see His hand here, now in the these moments? Do I dare? Will it change me?

I am going to try. Here I stand hands unfurling to blessings I may have missed waiting for someday to come.